Swear Off Love
by PlasticTramp
Summary: One shot: Bella is reacquainted with her former best friend Edward Cullen. Secrets are spilled and steamy confessions are made after a night of walking home in New York! AH AU OOC Lemon, hell yeah! R&R please.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello my wonderful lovely readers. This is a one shot, so enjoy the lemon. **

**I think you should have a chocolate shake and maybe a brownie.**

**But if you don't have any of those items, it's okay. a glass of water works too. :) Gotta have he sweet to counter out the sour of the lemonade. Although, I thought I should let you know, that if life hands you lemons, you should not immediately make lemonade, because it would be some suck ass lemonade. So demand sugar and water, or squirt the lemon juice in life's eyes. :)**

**Enjoy!!**

_Swear off men. Check. Swear off women. Check. Join the convent . . . ? Not so much. _

So my life is the best.

I was "born straight" or "a boy liker". I had relationships with only a select few, the ones that seem to like me back. And each and every one of them turned out to chauvinist pigs, and I wanted nothing to do with that select part of the species.

So I turned to women. Yes I know; so cliché. But I couldn't help it. A girl needed love somehow. But like men, they cheated on me, or tried to force me to do things I didn't want to. So it was over between me and my pathetic search for love.

So how exactly was I going to live . . . I didn't need a man. Or a woman for that matter. That's what they invented adult toy stores for. I would live without a significant other, seeing as how I was destined to be an old cat lady.

My sister/best friend Alice though, she was very supported of my decision. She called it "finding my soul", instead of what I called it: "dying alone."

So of course, naturally, she tried to make m find my soul in places there would be a lot of people. Like clubs or parties.

But then every one of them would turn out to be some douche bag, and I would hate them all, and then I would go home and sulk with Ben & Jerry.

"Okay," Alice said. She was in the bathroom, looking in the mirror as she spiked her hair up. She looked so much younger when she did that. But she was nearly twenty seven, so it was necessary I guess. Even though Alice as thirty would look the same as she had the past ten years. So the point was insignificant. "You look good Izzie," she said.

My name was Isabella. Alice was the only one that called me Izzie. Or Iz. Whatever blew her skirt up at that particular moment. I don't know how I landed a sister/best friend who was almost a decade older than me, but hey. My parents conceived a surprise. Yay me.

I was nineteen years old, and a sophomore in college. I was a dancer, ballet mostly. And even though I really liked to dance, I didn't like to go to places that I would eventually get my ass rubbed against. Not only was it sexual harassment, but I couldn't exactly get bothered by it when it was happening to everyone.

"Thanks, Liss." And in turn, I was the only person that could call my sister Liss.

We left the loft, in the wonderful complex in the Upper East Side, walking side by side a few blocks, until we got to the club. There was a long line f course. But Alice worked some sort of pixie magic that landed us on the VIP list.

The bouncer let me in, but he held Alice back, asking for her ID. Alice giggled. She handed it over and then they let her inside. She disappeared and I went directly to the bar. Alice and I were frequent here, so I knew all of the bartenders by first name. And they knew me and my drink of the night, just by the expression on my face.

I was a little apathetic tonight, so I just settled for a bottle of Heineken. They didn't check my ID, because they knew me that personally. And obviously, they thought I could use a drink. Seth was my favorite bartender, because he was closest to my age. A new born twenty one. I remember the first time I saw him. I had the biggest crush. But he was already engaged to a girl, so I couldn't really make a move. And he was so nice to me I couldn't really hold the crush anymore, and we just turned out to be friends.

"What's got you down today, B?" he asked, passing me the green bottle.

"Just life. Just tired of it all. All the good people are taken, and the loft isn't big enough to hold eighty cats," I said with a smile. He laughed.

"You'll find him," Seth said with a happy grin. "Just like I found my Kimmie," he said.

I sighed. If only I were that easy. I put my head in my hands, and then let the tears fall a little bit. I wish I would have never left Arizona. I hadn't been there since I was in the eighth grade. I only had a few friends, but that was besides the point. The point was, I wouldn't be worrying about all this crap, because I would have had my soul mate already.

I wiped my tears and put on a fake smile.

"I'm getting off now," Seth said. "But the other guys are here for you if you want to talk," he said. "Call me tomorrow and tell me how it goes.

I nodded and gave him a hug, giving him a wet sloppy kiss. "Say hi to Kimmie for me."

He nodded and then he was gone.

It was only a little after midnight, and I had only had one beer, and that was usually my limit, but I think I was going to order something flirty and fun, and then go home and read and read Cosmo as I had a wondrous bath.

"Miss?" I looked up and stared into a pair of green eyes. They were beautiful and mesmerizing . . . familiar.

"Yeah?" I said back, trying to figure out why he looked so familiar, why he aroused some of the most suppressed feelings I've been keeping.

"What are you drinking?" he asked. His lips slowly pulled up at the sides into a grin. "I can't believe it.

"What? Is my make up running or something?" I said, wiping underneath my eyes and down my cheeks. He laughed and shook his head. His voice, deeper now, but still a distant, forgotten memory.

"I can't believe you forgot me," he said. His voice held a little sad, but I couldn't figure him out. But man, his eyes were doing something to my, erm, lower regions.

"Forgot you? I don't even know you," I said curtly.

"You do know me though," he said. He smiled cockily. I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Okay, fine, whatever. But could you get me a screwdriver while I search my brain?" I asked him. He made my drink, still with that contemptuous grin on his face. I took a sip and then I sighed. "Alright, fess up. Where the hell am I supposed to know you from?" I asked. He laughed. And it was a warm, vibrant, familiar laugh. Goosebumps ran up and down my skin. Even the skin he couldn't see.

"You really don't know?" he asked. I shook my head.

"If you're a bad memory, then I tend to forget those much easier. But if you're a good memory . . . well, I tend to forget those too," I said truthfully. I flashed him a full toothed smile he smiled back.

"Well, what about when you were seven, and I was ten, and you climbed a tree so you could try to fly off of it . . .?"

_*Twelve years ago*_

_I finished putting on my dress after taking a bath. It was white and pretty. Mommy said girls were supposed to only wear pretty dresses like mine. When I went downstairs, someone rang the door bell. I looked out of the window before answering and then opened the door to let the boy who lived next door inside. He was my best friend in the whole wide world. He smiled at me, and I closed the door. _

"_Hi Isabella," he said. "Want to go play in the tree house?" he asked. I smiled at him and nodded. I took his hand and we ran to my mother's bedroom where she was grabbing her purse and her keys. _

"_Mommy! Can we go outside to the tree house?" I asked my mother. He was holding hands with me, because he was older and wasn't scared that he was going to get cooties for a girl. _

"_Yes, Isabella. Ask your sister if she'd watch you, because Mommy is leaving."_

"_Okay!" So he and I ran up the stairs and into Alice's room. She was there with her boyfriend Jasper, and they were studying for something called the SAT's. I was too little to know what that was. "Liss," I said. "We want to go to the tree house, but Mommy says you have to watch us," I said. _

_She smiled. "Okay Kiddo. I'll order some pizza for lunch too, okay?" _

_I nodded with a big smile. I had lost my two front teeth that summer, so Liss told me I was even more cuter than the normal kids. She picked me up so she could kiss the top of my head. I giggled. Liss was my favorite preson in the entire world. _

_We all went outside, but Alice and Jasper stayed inside to order the pizza. _

_I turned to my best friend and smiled. "I'm going to climb the tree, and I'm going to fly. Mommy says I'm an angel, and angels can fly," I told him. He smiled. _

"_Okay. But if you fall," he said. "I'll catch you."_

_I laughed and went ahead to climb the tree. When I reach a place that was high enough, I called down. "Ready?" _

_He held out his arms. "Ready," he said._

_I counted to three, and then I jumped, he catching me when I fell. We both tumbled to the floor and then we laughed, loud and freely. I wasn't hurt, that much, only my knees were scraped and my dress was dirty now. _

"_You were supposed to fly," he said. His eyes sparkled. I had a crush on him. A big crush. I always wrote in my diary that I wanted to be Mrs. Isabella Cullen. I giggled again._

"_I know. But I wanted you to catch me," I said to him._

_He didn't say anything for a minute, and then he smiled at me. "You're pretty, Isabella," he said._

_I blushed and then I ran into the house._

_He never called me pretty again._

_As we grew, his adjectives grew vibrantly. He called me beautiful, and radiant . . . . _

"Edward," I breathed.

He nodded. "I'm hurt Bells, that you would forget the boy who caught you when you thought you could fly."

"I was seven. We all think we can fly at seven," I said. I smiled at him though. I couldn't help it.

"You look beautiful you know," he said casually. And I blushed, because it wasn't like I was oblivious to the looks of this man. He was very, very hot. Very. His hair was collar length, longer than I remember him ever keeping it, and his eyes were a darker green. But it was still beautiful. Very beautiful. And he was in all black; black button up, black tie, black jeans, black converse. He was a fantasy brought to life.

"Thanks. You look good too," I said back. A big, hot, red blush spread across my cheeks, and I looked away from his eyes.

Oh man. I was losing it. I swore off men. And women, but I was thinking about things. Explicit things, like what he would look like naked and how he would feel inside of me, thrusting his hips as he palmed my beasts . . . I shook my head lightly and blushed again. He mumbled something and then smiled.

"Well," I said. "It was great seeing you, but I think I should go. It's getting pretty late," I said. I stood off the stool, catching my balance when someone bumped into me. I texted Alice and told her I was leaving, she told me she was fine, that she'd met up with Jasper. Why he doesn't marry me is a freaking mystery. But whatever.

Pretty risky walking in New York at 12:30 in the morning, sure, but I could handle myself. Sharp stiletto heels make great weapons. To anyone. And being sisters with Alice made me learn how to defend myself quite well.

He smiled. "Walking?"

I nodded. "I get off now," he said looking at the clock. "Want me to walk you home?"

I deliberated for a second.

He smiled at me. "You're allowed to say no," he said.

Nothing would happen. Just two friends rekindling, right? So, I said, "Sure."

It was almost winter time, so we walked close to each other, the air having a mean, cold bite to it. The wind whipped my hair all over the place, and all I wanted was that warm bath.

"So," I said. "How have you been?"

"Good. Just trying to pass the time, you know?" he said. "I just graduated from college, so I'm sure exactly what to do."

"Yeah." I laughed. "Well, I'm only a sophomore, so I have time, but you know."

"What about you? What have you been doing since I last saw you?" he asked. His voice was hurt. And I wondered why. What had I done to him that would make him feel that way.

"Well, after I graduated last year, I got accepted into NYU. I'm and Education major and I teach Dance Classes at the studio near the loft."

"Wow," he said. "When did you become a dancer?" he asked.

"The year after I left."

He looked down at me, with his gorgeous green, sparkly eyes, and my body warmed with guilt. We walked in silence for a while. I didn't know what to say to him. He was my best friend, and I didn't know what to say to him.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"Not your fault," he said.

I shook my head. "You were my best friend, and I forgot all about you," I said.

He laughed. "That may be, but I think you were just having a bad day," he said.

I cackled. "Day? Try the last three years of my life."

So I told him about my relationships. About being with douche bag guys, and slutty ex-girlfriends. And that I swore off guys and girls all together.

He was surprised in that one, his eyes a little sad.

I sighed. "What about you?"

"Well, the year after you left, my parents died in a car accident and-"

I jumped on him, his arms immediately wrapping around my waist. The warmth of his body made me shiver, but I couldn't help it. I felt bad for him, having lost his parents at such a young age. "I'm sorry," I whispered to him.

He groaned and then he said, "It's okay."

I pulled away from him and he set me on the floor. I looked up at him and placed my hand on his cheek. He smiled and leaned into the touch. I ran my fingers through his hair, and then I smiled at him.

"I miss you," he said to me.

I just smiled.

We stopped at the seven-eleven, and I bought a hot chocolate and a candy bar. Edward bought an energy drink, and just waited and then we continued walking to the loft.

He continued what he'd been saying.

"So after that year, I was a musician. And then I got bored, so started bar-tending for a few months and it's been three years now. Don't know what I want to do. Don't think I care. I don't really have to work, but I need something to do." He sighed. "You don't know how much I missed you," he said. I looked up at him, my lust growing for him so much stronger. "Yeah, you were young, but I always thought you were the most beautiful thing I'd ever saw. Even when your two front teeth were missing." He laughed, and butterflies flew around my stomach batting around the walls of my insides.

"So, what? You had a crush on me?"

He nodded and laughed. "Are you really that oblivious? I mean, my best friend was a girl that played with skateboards and baseballs, in frilly white dresses. It's kind of hard not to like a girl like that," he said. "I mean, you came over to my house dressed for church, asking me if I wanted to shoot some hoops." He laughed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to totally ambush you with old feelings," he said.

I sighed. "It's okay. It's nice to know I was admired. But now it's all-" I cut myself off, turning to the right so I could walk up the sidewalk that lead to the building Alice and I lived in. "You want to come inside?" I asked him.

He hesitated for a moment, and then he nodded.

"Come on."

I said hi to the doorman, grabbing Edward's hand. He smiled at me. Me and the Shawn the Doorman were close together. I smiled back at him. He winked. We took the elevator up to the twenty fourth floor. Then I lead Edward down the hall and unlocked the door to the penthouse.

"Wow," he said when he walked in. "I've never seen so much pink. Even Alice's room wasn't that bad."

I laughed. "That's Alice for you. I let her decorate the entire room, except for mine." I smiled. "You wanna see?"

He smiled. "Bella, what are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm-I just want to see something-I think I just want to try something. Is that okay?" I said softly. I shook the hair out of my eyes and then smiled. "What if I promise to make it worth your while?" I asked.

He laughed. "Bella, that's a promise you have to live up to," he said very lowly. I shivered. I took his hand and then took him upstairs. I opened the door and he smiled.

He looked around the room and I smiled. I shrugged out of my jacket and kicked off my heels. I put my hair in a pony tail and plopped on my bed. Edward sat on the edge.

"Now this is a bedroom." OF course it was. It was like Edward's old room back in Arizona. Posters of rock bands on the wall, flat screen TV on the wall, a deep midnight blue paint, and nothing but books and clothes covered the floor.

"So why don't we use it?" I said. He shook his head and smiled. "So what brought you to New York?" I asked.

"Hot chicks and eight dollar a pack cigarettes," he said. I laughed.

"Gives you enough incentive to quit, huh?" I told him. He smiled, taking off his jacket. We talked for a long time, just about college and past relationships and parents. I wished a lot that I hadn't missed all of Edward's life. He was a beginning junior when I moved, and I was only in the eighth grade, but we were still best friends. We slept over each others houses and he taught me things Alice couldn't, like things about boys only a boy would know. I was never shy around him. When he was off having sex with junior, senior, and college girls, I was in my room wishing I was one of those girls; Edward Cullen was a catch, whether he knew that or not. He always told me that my brain was more advanced than my body, and I believed it too. But I wished that my body would hurry and catch up so he wouldn't see me as the cute-girl-next-door, but the hot chick he wanted to date. .

We talked for hours, eating cookies and drinking wine. We got comfy on my bed, taking off shoes and layers of clothes, his head on my stomach, my fingernails running over his scalp through his smooth, soft hair.

"I feel like I'm seventeen again," he said. I looked at him, confused. He was twenty two. It wasn't like he was old, because he wasn't . . .

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Just the fact that I'm in a pretty girl's bedroom and we're all alone," he said. I smiled.

"Then why don't we make use of this pretty girl's bedroom?" I said.

"What about the fact that you swore off men?" He asked. He turned his head to look at me, an arrogant smile taking form on his lips.

"Did I say men? I meant chauvinist pigs that use me. I think you're man enough to handle me," I said. "You like me. You've always liked me. And for you to still like me even when I went through frizzy hair and braces, that tells me something, Edward. I know, this is sudden, but I need something in my life right now, and I think you can give it to me."

"Really?" he said.

I nodded. "A one night stand? Just like that?" he asked.

"Maybe not a one night stand, but we can definitely explore some things . . ."

He stood there, incredulous. "Bella-"

"It's me Edward. It's just me. The Bella that flew out of the tree, just so the cute boy next door would catch me," I said. "Just please? I want this. Let's explore what we have here. Because I would be lying if I said I didn't like you back."

He sat up and looked at me. "You're sure?"

I nodded. "A chick can't swear off all men," I said to him.

He smiled and pulled off his shirt.

Dammit! Not only was he completely able to get my emotions out, but he was also very capable in making me very, very wet.

I blushed. He pulled me up so I was sitting in front of me, and then, he pulled the scrunchy out of my hair, leaning in to kiss my neck. "You're so beautiful . . . and sexy . . ." he whispered against my neck. When he reached the sensitive spot, I moaned, and he pulled me closer. He kissed up my throat and then finally reached my lips. I kissed him back, and he pulled me closer to him, pushing me lightly so I would lie back. His weight on top of my body felt amazing. I welcomed his strength with open arms-and legs. He settled against me, and I involuntarily bucked against his hips. He groaned.

"Shit Bella," he said. I moaned as he said my name.

His hands roamed all over my body. He touched my breasts running his hands up and down my waist, eventually going underneath my blouse. He hummed against my mouth when he cupped them fully, and I pulled back, throwing back my head at the feeling. No one had ever touched me so carefully, so sensually. Man, if I could take back every time I had sex for just this one time, life would be complete. Very complete.

"Don't stop," I said. He kissed my neck, and I ground my hips against him. I couldn't wait for him to be inside me . . . "Edward," I breathed. "Please."

He set me on the bed, unbuttoning my jeans. I watched his fascination as he looked over my body. As he slid my jeans off, he ran his hands over my legs. I was so glad that I had waxed a few days before. I pulled off my blouse, sitting only in my panties now.

"Your turn," I said, crawling over to him. I unbuttoned his jeans, admiring his body. I remembered when he first started working out. His body had gotten more muscular and so hot. And I was too young to even touch him that way. Now, everything was mine.

I pulled off his jeans and just marveled at the sight of him, at his hard, chiseled body, and very hot flesh. "It should be illegal to look that hot Edward Cullen," I said, taking out his wallet and pulling out a condom. That was the third thing he taught me.

I walked over to him crawling on top, leaning down to kiss him. He kissed me back, his hands on my ass. "I want to be on top," I said, mumbling against his lips. He laughed.

"Sure," he said. He rolled us over and I laughed. "But first . . ." He ran his fingers up the side of my body, and then over my thigh, then in between, he was looking in my eyes the entire time. When he slid a finger over my sex, my hips jerked up.

"Oh, God yes," I said. He dragged my panties off my body, touching me again, finding my spot, making me scream. He slid a finger in me, and I moaned.

"Jesus Bella," he said against my breast, where he was kissing and licking and making me feel so good. "You're so . . . tight."

"Mmm," I said. "I don't want to come like this," I said. "I want you inside of me.

"Are you sure?"

I smiled and rolled my eyes. "Stop being a gentleman, and just fuck me," I said. He raised an eyebrow. He was amused.

"Yeah?"

"Hell yeah."

He let me out form under him, and then I stood up, dragging his boxers down his legs.

Sheesh. His was big, and I'd never had someone that big. "Edward," I said. "Are you even going to fit?" I siad with a teasing smile. He laughed.

"Bella." He rolled his eyes.

"I'm just saying," I said, bringing up the little foil packet to my mouth and using my teeth to rip it open. "I don't think my vag is that big."

He laughed again. I straddled him, rolling on the condom. He groaned. "You're feisty Bella. I like it."

I smiled. He guided his erection to my entrance, and I lowered my body. "Fuck yeah," I whispered, taking a second to adjust to him. I honestly though it was actually very pleasurable. I moved slowly, and he sat up, one arm holding himself up, and the other holding me around the waist. And then it started. I was grinding against him, moving slowly at first in circles, but then I was sliding up and down, my hand going between us to rub furiously at my clit. "Oh, Edward," I said. He thrust up into me, and I threw my head back as he kissed my breasts. He licked my nipples and I squeaked, rocking back and forth.

"God, Bella," he said. His voice was low and primal, and it only drove my wild. I ran my fingers through his hair, tugging softly as I moved faster, slammed my hips harder to his.

"Yes!" I screamed. "Shit, right there!" I rubbed harder at my clit, digging my nails into his skin with my other hand, writhing, waiting for everything to let go.

"Come with me Bella," he said.

"I . . . I-"

"Just let go, Bella. Fucking come."

And then it happened, and I shut my eyes tightly, screaming softly at the feelings that I felt. There was an extra warmth I felt, and then I was coming down, breathing hard and fast, panting against Edward's neck. Oh, man, I thought I would never have an orgasm again. I held Edward close for a second. I pulled back and looked at Edward, suddenly embarrassed. I closed my eyes and rolled over onto my stomach. I hid my face.

He was silent for a minute, and then I felt the bed moved. I peeked my eyes open, and Edward was cleaning himself off, pulling his boxers back on. I hid underneath the covers of my blankets.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked. I blushed. I shrugged.

"I don't know. I just feel weird. Like embarrassed weird," I said. I turned over and faced the wall, not looking at him. I felt the bed move, and he wrapped an arm around me, tugging me.

"Bella," he said. "Bella look at me."

I looked up at him. "What?"

"You're beautiful. You're sexy. What's there to be embarrassed about?"

"I don't know." I leaned forward and kissed him. "I just think that maybe that this was it. And I don't know." I sighed. "If you want to leave-"

He smiled, and I stopped talking. A million thoughts were going through my head. But all I wanted to know was what he was thinking.

"What?" I asked.

"Is that what this is about. That I would leave you, right after the best sex of my life."

I blushed. "Shut up."

He laughed, but his eyes were serious. "Bella," he said. "I'm not going to leave you. When you said there were things to explore, I was happy, because I really do like you. Bella, I couldn't imagine a girl better than you. So, if you don't mind," he said. "I'm not going anywhere."

I smiled. "Really?"

He nodded. I sat up and hugged him, my body connecting perfectly.

"But," he said. I pulled back to look at his face.

"What?"

"You have to promise me one thing," he said. I stared into his shimmering green eyes and nodded. My heart pounded against my chest.

"What?" I asked. "What is it?"

"You have to swear off all the other men," he said. I smiled. "And women," he added.

I laughed.

"On one condition," I said.

"Shoot."

"We have hot, passionate, amazing, _chocolaty_ sex all night long."

Edward laughed. "Chocolate?"

"It just so happens no one's ever licked it off my body."

"Well," he said, "there's a first for everything."

"Then let's get to it, huh?"

He smiled and pressed his wonderful, lush lips to mine.

Fuck yeah.

**Please review guys. I promise to love you forever. Tell me what you thought :) It's great. Reviewing makes everyone happy. XD**


	2. Author's Note

Hello readers! :)

Changed my name! Again, I know. But this one is going to stick. I changed it because I had so many different usernames for all my online crap so I changed it all to LetsMakePoison, only because I love Lady Gaga and in the "Telephone" video she has a little segamnt where she makes poison . . . and thus my name was inspried. So yes.

And Also.

I have a new story up. It's called _Whisper Sweet Nothings. _It's bascally all the lemons, one-shots, and fluff I can't put into my stories, but they keep me awake at night, so . . . the first chapter is a lemon. I thought some of you smut lovers might be enticed to read that. So don't forget to review. :)

And for my Serious Impulse readers:

Sorry about the death threats. If you want to review, go on and do it! (Please! :)) but if you don't, I'm not holding anything against you. But let me remind you that this story was written in advance, so things are already set on what's going to happen. However, thanks for reading and reviewing. It is very much appreciated!

Alright. That's enough of my incessat ranting and stuff :)

Follow me on Twitter for updates and junk of fanfiction and all that gooey goodness. I might even post sneak peaks to next chapters.

And now. Question of the day (if you choose to answer):

If you could be any television show character, what would it be? I think I'd like to be Azula, from Avatar: the Last Airbender. She's pretty badass.

PM me, direct message me on twitter, or even email me if you want! :)

Alright! Byee.

(I look forward to reading your answers.)


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